Bored at office???
March 12, 2007 by Suree · Leave a Comment
Hai,
What If you find it very boring in the office? here are some tips…….Try it!
I am not responsible if ur FIRED!!
Here u go………. ……… ..
1. Form a detective agency to find out who is quitting next.
2. Make blank calls to your Boss.
3. Count your fingers (and toes if you still get bored).
4. Rearrange the furniture, i.e. flick someone else’s chair just to irritate him/her.
5. Send mails from ms-mail to your internet mail (and immediately Get to the internet and see who reaches first, you or your mail?) and read them there, and note down the time they take to reach there. Then do vice versa……. …… !!
6. Watch other people changing their facial expressions while Working and try changing your expressions also.
7. Try to stretch status meetings as longer as possible, just by Asking silly doubts.
8. Have work breaks in between tea.
9. Have a two hour lunch; it’s a big social occasion.
10. Read jokes and send jokes.
11. Revise last week’s newspaper.
12. Hold “How fast my computer boots” competitions.
13. Practice aiming the coffee cup into the dustbin.
14. Compile “How to waste your day”
15. Pick up phone and dial non existing nos.
16. Make faces at strangers in office.
17. Count maximum no of applications your computer can open at time.
18. For Win NT/95 users….Move things to Recycle bin and restore them..Then repeat this process.
19. Look at someone & try to imagine how(s) he might have looked when(s) he was 5 years old.
20. Learn to whistle.
21. Make full use of the comfortable chair and table provided and Take a nap.
And if you are still bored-…… …… ………… . then…….. ……. call everybody in the office and give this website address
Phone bill
March 12, 2007 by Suree · Leave a Comment
The phone bill was exceptionally high and the man of the house called a family meeting.
*Dad:* People this is unacceptable. You have to limit the use of the phone. I do not use this phone, I use the one at the office.
*Mom*: Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use my work telephone
*Son*: Me too, I never use the home phone. I always use my company mobile
*Maid*: So what is the problem? We all use our work telephones
Wonderful definitions of designations at office:
February 3, 2007 by Suree · Leave a Comment
1) Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month.
2) Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.
3) Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
4) Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.
5) Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
6) Resource Optimization Team thinks they don’t need a man or woman; they’ll produce a child with zero resources.
7) Documentation Team thinks they don’t care whether the child is delivered, they’ll just document 9 months.
Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce a baby.
And lastly……………..
9) Tester is a person who always tells his wife that this is not the Right baby
New Kind of Medical Certificate::Hilarious
February 3, 2007 by Suree · Leave a Comment
CHECK OUT NEW STYLE OF CUSTOM-MADE MEDICAL CERTIFICATE..DO GET URSELF ONE..ASAP..
Doctor Certified
Certified that Mr. /Miss _________________ , working in your
organization, is suffering from ‘time-bound’ illness. Due to this,
he/she will NOT be able to work more than 8 hours a day and 5 days a
week. Any attempt to stretch beyond this timing will lead to severe
health problems. The losses to the company due to medical reimbursements
will be far more compared to the gains made by stretching beyond 8
hours.
It is also warned to keep my patient away from any kind of shocking news
such as ” Come over weekend..”, ” Let’s work on holiday..”, ” Leave
cannot be granted. .” etc. which can directly lead to heart strokes.
In view of the above, it is strongly recommended to adjust your
deadlines in accordance with the convenience of my patient.
Sd/-
Dr. Impatient
Cyber Clinic
